Whether you are in secondary school, university, or you graduated so long ago that your certificate has turned yellow, student life leaves memories that never go away. The night reading, the “carry over” fear, the friend who says “I didn’t read anything” and then scores an A. Here are fourteen fresh student jokes, written specially for you by the Mairago team.
Exam Season Jokes
- A student told his mother he was reading for exams all night. She asked, “Then why is your phone at 2 percent and your textbook still has the shop’s nylon on it?”
- My friend said he would read “one chapter per day” for the exam. The exam has twelve chapters. It is in three days. He is a believer, and I respect that.
- Student: “Sir, will this be in the exam?” Lecturer: “Everything I teach is important.” Student (closing notebook): “So that is a no.”
- During exams, the hall is so quiet you can hear a student’s brain loading. Sometimes you can even hear it buffering.
- A student wrote in his answer sheet: “Please, sir, I know the answer, but I cannot remember it right now. Kindly award marks for effort.” The lecturer gave him one mark and wrote: “Effort noted. Knowledge missing.”
Lecturer and Classroom Jokes
- When a lecturer says “this is my last slide,” that is the beginning of a new series. Season two, episode one.
- Our lecturer said, “Feel free to ask questions.” The last person who asked a question is now the class representative.
- A student came late to class and said, “Sorry sir, there was traffic.” The lecturer said, “You live in the school hostel.” The student said, “Yes sir, traffic at the bathroom queue.”
- Group assignment rule: one person does the work, two people give advice, and the rest send “Well done, guys” on the group chat.
Hostel Life Jokes
- In the hostel, if you hear someone frying plantain at midnight, you suddenly remember that you are friends with them.
- My roommate borrowed my bucket “for one minute” in first year. I graduated last month. The minute is still running.
- A student opened his provisions box and found only one sachet of milk and a note: “We were hungry. We are sorry. Signed, the whole room.”
Pocket Money Jokes
- A student called his father: “Daddy, how are you? How is your health? How is work?” The father said, “Just tell me how much you need.”
- When pocket money arrives, a student eats like a king for three days. On the fourth day, he discovers garri and starts calling it “a healthy lifestyle choice.”
Why Student Days Are the Best
Looking back, those were some of the most fun years of our lives. We had little money, plenty of friends, and an endless supply of stories. The lecturer who never ended class on time is now a funny memory. The roommate who borrowed your bucket is probably now a successful businessman, still with your bucket.
If you are still a student, enjoy it, read your books, and please, return your roommate’s bucket. If you have graduated, send this article to your old school friends and watch the memories flow back into the group chat.
A Bonus Thought for Parents
Dear parents, when your child says “I am reading,” please do not check their phone screen. Some things are better left as a mystery. Just send the pocket money and pray.
Which of these jokes reminded you of your school days? Share this with your classmates and drop your own clean student joke in the comments!
Featured image: Photo: “Lao student classroom picture.” by chaitea16oz, public domain, via Openverse — source
